We had a fallout. Then we stopped talking. We would run into each other... rather, I'd time myself hoping to cross her path, succeeded a few times, failed more so often. When I succeeded, I was met with blank expressions. I'd like to quote a very close friend of mine. He said, "The opposite of love isn't hatred. It's indifference." I was momentarily taken aback by the correctness of his statement, although what my friend uttered, referred to a very different scenario.
Something very unnerving about psychology is the fact that you never....evvvver get to know what the person you think about, is thinking, specialllly if the person is a lady. Maybe that sentence needs to be read again. One exception in my case is this friend of mine, whom I just quoted. Our thoughts come out like photocopies!
So she and I don't talk, or...maybe she doesn't hear what I say. Although I say a lot of things in my head, only sometimes do these things come out in a form, that the human ear finds decipherable. Hmmm.... I kind of see the problem here.
I was at this place to run a few errands. Suddenly, she turns up, obviously with some things of her own to do. For the first moment, I didn't really understand what exactly was happening. There was this sudden jolt-ish feeling I got in my belly, then felt my ticker exploding every second, right through my chest, my ears felt hot... usual stuff that happens when you see 'YOUR ONE'. But somehow, a few moments pass and I kept to myself, continuing to do what I'd come for hopefully not betraying the things going on inside me out into the public.
Having noticed her fully after the initial hiccups, I tried to get her to acknowledge my presence. Not with some usual "Hi!" or something. Okay, I didn't do a lot except for stealing a few glances...okay, maybe not glances, but definitely not stares!! Something in the middle of the two. Whatever I did.....no acknowledgement, what so ever! Not that she owed me one, or something.
Anyways, I didn't take too long to finish off with my things. I left, trying my best not to look at her.
After I left the place, I walked on for a few paces. What I did notice is that for some very deliberate reason, my steps were unusually slow, given that I walk pretty fast, at least in my own head. I knew what was troubling me. I just didn't want to think it aloud. The place where I was coming from, she was the only girl around. Besides, while I was getting my work done, I did not like the way one of the buggers in that place had looked at her the whole time. I actually thought it was rather stupid of her to come to this place all alone, definitely not doubting her ability to protect herself...maybe I was a bit doubtful. Also, maybe, I was feeling unnecessarily overprotective. Maybe, I was also feeling like a complete arsehole for leaving her behind alone. I just didn't want her to think that I was taking undue advantage of the situation to talk to her. So I walked back, ran back honestly, and waited near the building, just to ensure that she left the place fine. It was actually a few moments before I saw her walking out that I heaved a sigh of relief. But you know those moments of anxiety, and how long they seem. I was just happy to see her out of that place, despite not getting a chance to talk to her. I did not follow her after that though.
I definitely don't know if she saw me near the building. Most probably, I don't think she did. Well, if she did, I am afraid, she'd think that I was stalking her. What a predicament! Okay, no fancy words... What a Pain-in-the-arse!!!! I'm just happy, it isn't PILES!
How thoroughly I enjoy maintaining the anonymity of my lady! Although, I'd rather hope for a happier ending to the post instead!!
Something very unnerving about psychology is the fact that you never....evvvver get to know what the person you think about, is thinking, specialllly if the person is a lady. Maybe that sentence needs to be read again. One exception in my case is this friend of mine, whom I just quoted. Our thoughts come out like photocopies!
So she and I don't talk, or...maybe she doesn't hear what I say. Although I say a lot of things in my head, only sometimes do these things come out in a form, that the human ear finds decipherable. Hmmm.... I kind of see the problem here.
I was at this place to run a few errands. Suddenly, she turns up, obviously with some things of her own to do. For the first moment, I didn't really understand what exactly was happening. There was this sudden jolt-ish feeling I got in my belly, then felt my ticker exploding every second, right through my chest, my ears felt hot... usual stuff that happens when you see 'YOUR ONE'. But somehow, a few moments pass and I kept to myself, continuing to do what I'd come for hopefully not betraying the things going on inside me out into the public.
Having noticed her fully after the initial hiccups, I tried to get her to acknowledge my presence. Not with some usual "Hi!" or something. Okay, I didn't do a lot except for stealing a few glances...okay, maybe not glances, but definitely not stares!! Something in the middle of the two. Whatever I did.....no acknowledgement, what so ever! Not that she owed me one, or something.
Anyways, I didn't take too long to finish off with my things. I left, trying my best not to look at her.
After I left the place, I walked on for a few paces. What I did notice is that for some very deliberate reason, my steps were unusually slow, given that I walk pretty fast, at least in my own head. I knew what was troubling me. I just didn't want to think it aloud. The place where I was coming from, she was the only girl around. Besides, while I was getting my work done, I did not like the way one of the buggers in that place had looked at her the whole time. I actually thought it was rather stupid of her to come to this place all alone, definitely not doubting her ability to protect herself...maybe I was a bit doubtful. Also, maybe, I was feeling unnecessarily overprotective. Maybe, I was also feeling like a complete arsehole for leaving her behind alone. I just didn't want her to think that I was taking undue advantage of the situation to talk to her. So I walked back, ran back honestly, and waited near the building, just to ensure that she left the place fine. It was actually a few moments before I saw her walking out that I heaved a sigh of relief. But you know those moments of anxiety, and how long they seem. I was just happy to see her out of that place, despite not getting a chance to talk to her. I did not follow her after that though.
I definitely don't know if she saw me near the building. Most probably, I don't think she did. Well, if she did, I am afraid, she'd think that I was stalking her. What a predicament! Okay, no fancy words... What a Pain-in-the-arse!!!! I'm just happy, it isn't PILES!
How thoroughly I enjoy maintaining the anonymity of my lady! Although, I'd rather hope for a happier ending to the post instead!!
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